Did You Remember To Ask?

If you're a parent and your child is headed off to college, don't forget to add "Did you remember to ask about sex?" as one of the important things that needs to be discussed before they leave.

It's never too early for parents and kids to talk about safety and the risks that each student will face. College students are among the most at-risk groups when it comes to sexual assault, specifically from someone they know - not from some random stranger in a dark alley! Whether they are living on or off campus, every college student should have an emergency plan in place just in case he/she becomes too intoxicated and can't make it home. And if you've been in a situation like that, you know how easily you can get lost or confused.

It's also important to teach your kids about sexual consent. They should know how to say no to unwanted sexual advances and they should know how to say yes if they want to participate in a consensual activity. It's never okay for anyone, including your kids, to pressure someone else into anything involving sex.

If you're going through this transition with your child and finding it difficult to talk about these things, there are some great resources available on the web to help guide the conversation. You can read more about "Talking with Children About Sex" at nbnc.org.

So maybe you were too nervous to ask your child about his or her sexual history, but what if you weren't? What if you were accused on some trumped-up charge of molesting your son and found yourself in jail for that? In all probability, those are the kinds of problems for which someone would find themselves in prison just for not asking about the basics!

As parents, we should be honest with our kids and have conversations about sex so they can prepare for their future. But sometimes there's a way to ask without scaring them off. And sometimes that can be a good thing, like with the Republican National Convention.

It was an interesting experience being a parent in Philadelphia as the Republicans came together at their convention to nominate Donald Trump for President. My son, who is no stranger to controversial political events, was disturbed by this gathering of hate-filled people. He seemed terrified that one of them would make a sinister comment about his mother making cookies! But it was also an interesting opportunity to talk to him about politics and why people vote how they do. It helps explain why so many people support Trump - they don't understand how things work in politics.

That's where I can help with my "Did you remember to ask?" lessons. I couldn't stop at one election cycle, so I teach my kids about the Constitution and why we have a system of government that works. And it's no different for voters. It's important to understand how the whole process works, what politicians do, how they get elected and all of the different issues. It helps them to be prepared when they are old enough to vote and maybe they'll even send a message in their voting booths that is good for their country.

But no one stays up at night worrying about the political process, which is why we need to talk with our kids about sex and the risks of sexual assault. Because sometimes, in politics or elsewhere in our lives, we just don't understand what's going on. And it's our kids that suffer for that lack of understanding. At least with a little bit of knowledge, some awareness and a little planning, we can help them prepare for what comes next.

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